Graycie, Come Home

It is with sadness and not a small amount of distress and panic that I report that our sweet cat is missing.  She got out yesterday when some workers were here at the house.  I don't think she would have gone very far, but we cannot find her.  We have posted signs and looked all over our neighborhood many, many times, but no luck.  I do hope that we can find her before she gets hurt or goes hungry or thirsty.  The nice thing about living here is that there is a big fence all around camp, so it's unlikely that she is outside of the compound.  But that's a big place!  (Charlotte peeps:  Mike says that the compound is about the same size as the area included by 51, Rea, and Providence.)

The last post was Oh, The Irony; this one should be Oh, The Agony.  Please, Graycie, come home.  Don't let anything bad have happened to you.  I am headed out to look one more time - Graycie, come home!

Oh, The Irony

Over the last 4 weeks, I’ve noticed that lots of things about living here are filled with irony.  Life over here is frustrating, inconvenient, and inefficient, largely because so many aspects of Aramco and Saudi culture just do not make sense or are wildly illogical.  Everyone I’ve met from the west notices these things.  The prevailing attitude amongst the westerners here is to just go with it; try not to understand it or change it, because if you do, you will go crazy.  I’ve begun to compile a list of the most blatant (but sometimes small) ironies I’ve noticed.  I’ll probably be updating this list the longer I live here.  Check back often!

NOTE:  In the dubious tradition of Alanis Morissette in her song Ironic, some of the items on the list are not truly irony in the English Teacher sense.  (Is rain on your wedding day really ironic, or just plain old bad luck?)  Some of these are just absurdities that I notice.  English Professors and former English majors who are reading this, please forgive me!

P.S.  This list is meant to be funny, not negative!  It’s hard to convey playful sarcasm over the internet, but that’s how this is meant.  

Ironies of the Aramco Rules:    I already noticed that you have to call to get your phone service started.  You also have to make a request online to get your internet started.  There is no other way to do these things.  (That is, you can’t go to the phone office and ask for your phone service to be started.  You MUST call them on the phone.)  Argh!  There are lots of these.  Too many to list. 

Ironies of Saudi Culture:  Saudi culture is very intolerant of any other religions.  For example, you’re not allowed to wear a cross around your neck, and they took the Armed Forces Radio down because they played Christmas music with words.  Saudi culture also has a lot of rules:  you can’t show people’s faces in pictures because it’s considered idolatry, you can’t hold hands in public, store owners must close five times a day for prayer, etc.  So both Mike and I were dumbfounded when we saw the following picture displayed on a large, prominent wall in Ikea:

Do they just not know??  Surely if they knew that this is two men, with faces, practically holding hands, in a very famous image painted on the ceiling of an important chapel in the very *HUB* of Christianity, they would object.  Are they that ignorant of the west?  Mike thinks they are just that sheltered from the outside world – they just have no idea what this image means or symbolizes.  Or perhaps they just do not care.  We blinked, stared, shrugged our shoulders and kept shopping, but it’s been a theme of discussion for a couple of days now.  Bamboozled.  

Furthermore, we left Ikea and went to the mall, where we saw a large clothing store with one single mannequin in the window – wearing a Notre Dame t-shirt.  What???  Again, do they just not realize?  Hello, big famous CATHOLIC school?!  Not to mention, jeez, Notre Dame is *everywhere*.  Sigh.  Go figure.  

 

Ironies of Language:  Language barriers are always fun.  And very few people here speak intelligible English.  Stuff gets garbled in translation.  Our baby shampoo (which has the amusing brand name "Chubs") has the message “KEEP AWAY FROM CHILDREN” scrawled all over the back.  The midwife at the hospital told me my baby was dead while I was feeling her kicking.  (That made my blood run cold.  I didn’t like that one bit.)  (Of course, that’s not what she meant.  She just didn’t speak English well.)  The cell phone store where we tried by buy a cell phone just told us “No.”  Here’s how the conversation went:

“How much is that phone in the case?”  He takes it out and shows it to us.  

“No. This is not a phone.”

“It’s not a phone?  It is a phone.  What do you mean it’s not a phone?  How about that one?  How much is that phone?”  “No.”

“I want to buy the phone.” “No.”

“Here is my money.  Please tell me how much it is.”  “No.”

“How about that phone?  How much is that one?”  “No.”

“I want to buy a phone here.  This is a phone store, right?”  “No.”

Eventually another guy came over and managed to spit out “Out of stock.”  But apparently, ALL the phones were out of stock.  Either nobody spoke enough English to help us, or they didn’t want to sell to us for some reason (perhaps because my face was not covered? We were Americans?  We are still not sure.)  But I do think it’s ironic that they won’t sell phones at the phone store.  And not very smart – how do these people make any money?  

KEEP AWAY FROM CHILDREN!!!!

Ironies of Money:  Speaking of money, I find it ironic that we pay a grand total of $7 to fill up our borrowed car with 91 octane gas at a full service gas station (YAY!) but pay $18 for a package of Pepperidge Farm Goldfish (WOW, I must really love my kids.)  I guess grain is plentiful at home and oil is plentiful here, huh?  Gotta love Econ. 

More valuable than oil!

Ironies of Getting Set Up Over Here:  Mike was very lucky to get this job.  Apparently, Aramco hires Americans only into the advanced “expert” positions, and hires Saudis for all the entry level and lower level jobs (and the extreme upper level jobs, too).  So it means that they think he’s big stuff since we are over here.   

But the moment we stepped off the plane, we were stripped of any adult privileges we had earned by age or hard work or experience in the States.  No driver’s license, no car.  Renting a house instead of owning one.   Surrendering our passports to the Aramco passport office.  Acknowledging that we cannot leave the country.  Rendering our credit and debit cards practically useless, and using only cash for everything.   Only having about eight pieces of furniture and hardly any kitchen equipment.   Not allowing us to buy cell phones, or cars for that matter.  It’s as though they can’t decide if we are very mature and responsible, or if we are delinquent teenagers.  Feels like we’ve been demoted to “immediately after college” again, but this time we have two kids to support!  And we worked really hard and earned a position here to get to this point? 

Almost all of this will end, or has already ended as we get set up.  For example, once our our new visas come in, in several months, for example, we’ll be able to leave the country.   I have not dealt with cash since my freshman year of college, but now that Mike’s iqama came through, we can get a bank account here (although people still use cash for everything!  It’s very archaic, and it feels like Monopoly money because we go through it so fast.)  Same for car and cell phones.  But Aramco has been importing ex-pats for YEARS.  Seems like they could do a lot to make the transition faster and easier.   I could make a lot of suggestions!  But the irony of coming over will continue – because, like everything else, nothing here makes sense!  I will just have go with it, like everyone else.  Relax and enjoy the ride - it's not going to change!

Star Wars: A New Home

Mike's Iqama has come through!  Hooray!  This is our ticket to normalcy.  Now he can get a Saudi driver's license, and that means we can buy a car.  Now we can get cell phones.  Now we can get a bank account.  Now we can get exit-reentry visas, and now we can get visas set up for our parents to come visit.   Things are almost getting a lot better....almost there...stay on target...almost there..... (for those of you who don't know - yes, I do have several friends (two I think) who have never seen Star Wars, believe it or not  - this is a Star Wars reference.  Unfortunately, the guy who 'stayed on target' in his X-wing got shot down by a tie fighter in a big, puffy explosion right after this.) (Hmmm, maybe this is not a good reference to our situation after all!  Ha!)  (P.S. For you same people, the title of this post is also a Star Wars pun.)  In any case, we are maybe just a few days away from the driver's license and cell phones, and a week away from our own car.  Not much longer now. 

Almost there!

In other news, we were chatting with Everett over lunch about his new preschool, and we made an interesting discovery.  Apparently, there is a Luke in his class.  And a Leia.  Luke and Leia.  Not kidding!  Everett actually calls this Luke "new Luke" because there was a Luke in his old preschool class, too.  So it's Everett, Oliver, Sean, Achmed, new Luke, and Leia.  This can only mean one thing...we have inadvertently moved to Tatooine.  And Mike is not really a water engineer, he is a moisture farmer.  Check out the pictures of our environs.  See the resemblance?

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My Brilliant Idea!

Today, I had a brilliant idea!  We are not using the awful, crunchy sheets and comforters that Aramco gave us when we arrived.  They had been tossed into our enormous closet and have become a favorite home for the cat.  Mike and I are borrowing sheets, so we're not using ours, and now that the E-box came and we got the boys' bedding for their room, we really don't need the Aramco bedding any more.  Today, I realized that we could use the comforters as rugs!  It gives the kids something soft to sit on when they play on the floor, rather than the cold, hard tile, and it gives the living room a more human feel - just something fabric and soft, instead of all these hard surfaces.  Ingenious!  Makes playing in the tent (an E-box arrival) much more fun. 

My brilliant idea! 

It was cold and windy today, and by the end of the day, so much dust had been kicked up into the air that you could look directly into the sun (without going blind, or hurting your eyes, or even needing to look away).  We spent most of the day taking turns napping and doing stuff inside (like Mike took a couple of doors off the hinges for me, and hung some brackets for mini blinds, and nearly electrocuted himself by trying to adjust the temperature of the water heater - he accidentally welded his Swiss Army Knife to the water heater in the electrocution process -oops), so by the end of the day, we were all bored (despite the electrocution scare) and the boys got to watch a movie.  Here's our TV setup in the living room - thank you, thank you, whoever invented laptops!!

Watching "The Squirrel Show" (= Ice Age).  Note Sleep Sack and Hippo are still permanently attached. 

 

Beach Trip to the Persian Gulf

Today was very exciting, because several of our friends arranged for us to go on a beach trip with them!  Aramco has a beach about 20 minutes away from the compound, and we all drove as a caravan there.  

Getting to the beach is a bit rough.  Well, more than a bit - it is very rough.  The outside world immediately around the compound is a dump.  There is trash everywhere, and piles of old tires, and mounds of construction waste, all just scattered about on the desert.  Occasionally, you might see a palm tree.  The roads are fine (we didn't drive on that road we drove on when we were here 2 years ago - see picture below), but the drivers are recklessly aggressive.  And the rules of the road are a bit different; for example, we encountered an intersection where we had to cross an interstate as though we were at a four way stop - just pull up to the side of this interstate, wait for a break in traffic, and floor it across to the other side.  We are going to have to buy a gargantuan car to feel safe driving around here.

When we were here in 2009, this sign was a photo op rather than a deterrent.

 

The lovely, wide, sandy beach and the Persian Gulf

Once we got to the Aramco beach, though, it was much better.  We got a spot with three picnic tables and two grills and set up shop.  The boys saw the gulf, and ran to it!  It was their first time to touch the Persian Gulf.  The air was warm, but the water was really cold.  The boys did not care two hoots about that!  Everett paused at the shore long enough for us to roll up his pant legs and sleeves, so he didn't get too wet.  Lawrence just ran headlong into the water.  He did a really good job of staying upright for about 10 minutes, but he eventually did the inevitable face-plant and came up dripping from head to toe.  Did he want a towel?  Dry clothes?  A swimsuit?  "NO MAMA!!"  This translated as "I'm having way too much fun to be concerned with my physical well-being!"  I eventually did get both boys into a swimsuit, and they played and shivered at the water's edge for a long time.  The only thing that got them to come out, get dried off, and put on some dry clothes was Bugles.  We had brought Bugles with us, and they ate Bugles and juice while I dried them off and put them in clothes, and wrapped them in jackets and blankets.  They were still shivering, and had blue lips, for a long time!  

Lawrence and McLean at the shore

Mabry and Everett

Jump in the water!  "Jump, Jump!"

After a good soaking in clothes, it seemed like a good idea to change into swimsuits.

 

When they finally got warm, they played on the sand dunes and at the playground with the other children, and then we all got to eat the yummy chicken and pasta salad and veggies that everyone had brought.  When it got dark, the guys built a bonfire, and we roasted marshmallows and made s'mores.  The kids continued to play in the dark until about 8:00, when we finally had to pack up and come home.  It was a fun day, and the boys were WORN OUT.  Lawrence fell asleep before we left the Aramco beach gate.  The only downside was that we lost Lawrence's brand new crocs that we had JUST gotten in the e-box.  We looked and looked all over that beach, and I know he didn't take them off far from the picnic area.  DARN!  I think someone may have snatched them.  I think this place has a problem with petty theft that I was unaware of.  We'll have to wait until summer for more crocs.  I am still quite irked over that one.  But all in all, it was a good day...a good day to mark the fact that you are older than Jesus.  :)    (P.S. It was my first birthday at the beach - ever!  Actually, it was probably the first birthday I celebrated outside at all.  We winter birthdays don't get much variety, do we?)  

The E-Box Arrives!

Hooray!  The E-boxes arrived today - early!  We were told it would take up to six weeks to get them here, but they arrived in three.  It was like Christmas all over again!

E-boxes arrive on a truck at our house

One of two, being wheeled into the garage (Charlotte peeps: we now have a one-car garage!  YAY!)

It's here!

Chaos of getting them unloaded (PS - those guys were very helpful, but somebody needed to teach them about deodorant.)

I think we did a good job of planning what we packed into the E-box.  The most important item that we packed in the E-box was a new microwave.  Oh, the relief!  I can re-heat anything now, and not have to wait an hour for a baked potato!  The kids do leave a lot of leftovers that we usually save for the next meal, so I'm sure they will be happy not eating cold oatmeal as a snack again.  (Although, truth be told, I'm not sure they really minded all that much.)  We also put in their thermoses with the straw and some kids' plates and cups, which helps a lot.  Then there's the booster seat!  We no longer have to strap Lawrence to his chair with Daddy's belt.  (I did get a kick out of using that belt as a seat belt at the table, though, because it sounded so horrible when we talked about it to him:  "Lawrence, please stay in your chair.  No, don't get down.  Sit down, or it's time to get out the belt.  Ok, we're going to be using the belt on you now.  Honey, get out the belt.") 

Fuzzy blankie makes everything better - makes it seem like home!

More happy additions to our household included a potty seat and new undies for Lawrence (time to potty train, kiddo!  Sorry if you're not ready...but they don't sell your size diapers in the commissary), tupperware, the bedding for both boys' beds, some of the baby girl necessities for when she is born like blankets and take-home outfit, a printer, an alarm clock, some coat hangers (they only gave us five when we got here) and my embroidery machine!  We also put in some books and toys for the kids, the iPod player, and the sandwich griller.  So it's not a houseful, and it certainly doesn't solve all of our "feels like we're camping" issues, but it sure helps! Now we just have to buckle down and wait for the shipment of the rest of our stuff...which only just recently left Charlotte, and is sitting in the Port of Savannah as we speak. 

Mommy and Daddy left a present in the E-box - three baskets of pretend food!

Too funny not to share!

The Tabbouleh Song

Struck me as funny - the most I've laughed since we got here!

If I ever figure out how to make tabouli, I am going to dance like this guy.  And I know a certain gourmet cook in Rock Hill who might be able to give him some pointers on his recipe.  :)